Went to Exeter today.
Was originally gonna just go to Okey and eat a Bacon roll in a Cafe and force my mind into clarity. But the rain never came and it seemed dry, so I made a slap-dash decision to take the green greyhound out to Exe, for two main purposes (A4 sketchpad, go to Pharmacy) that I then completely ignored/forgot, and so then just explored.
There were lots of people on that initial bus. At one point it basically became full and I felt like I couldn't breathe, so was basically trying to get in the slipstream of the incrementally-open window. I don't know if I got that behaviour from Jess, or whether I was doing it before I met her, because in Church I remember she said when everyone's open-mouthed and singing Hymns she hated it, because she imagined they were using up the Oxygen and spreading germs everywhere and such. But I know that I have been in situations before that in Bristol where I felt similar about breathing people in compact spaces.
2 people tried to sit next to me, 1 succeeded. When old people got on the bus (from the outlying villages) as it was full, some tweenager studenty types, seeming a bit youtubery to me stood up for them. It reminded me of 'OhitsjustKim' for some reason. I went on a thought-spiral about how I relate to the younger breed of new-age teens.
When I got into the city I immediately wondered into the Railway Station, because, oh I wish I was getting on a train for another city-hop trip (maybe later in the year, if my bank can take it), but ambled straight out again and headed for the centre.
At one point on my way there you pass a graveyard and a monument...thing, and it's 'round about here that almost ALWAYS, without fail, the street is clogged up with zillions of teenagers. It's a bit like London rush-hour. There must be a hidden College around there, specifically. Anyway it makes me nervous and intimidated, I know there's probably a campaign or two saying "Hey, don't be intimidated by YOUTHS, we're nicer we're just younger than you." but the truth is I think there are lots of valid reasons for being avoidant of, not necessarily youths, but Extraverts, particularly the ones presently in school. Personal reasons more than anything.
Also, with the crowdedness of Exeter (as I walked further down) comes that striking multitude of faces and fashions and behaviours splashed into your face all at once, almost impossible to take in, and consider individually. This for me, embodies a visual reminder of Overpopulation. I thought to myself as well: "What am I NOT seeing?" Because there's even more HIDDEN stories in all those faces and interactions that I wish I could consider on an individual, 1-human-at-a-time basis, but you definitely can't see any of that. No thoughts, no tales, no reasons, no knowledge of where they are, or why, or where they're going, or what they're thinking, or what they did today, or who they hurt, or who'll learn from them later today, and what will be learnt...and all this.
Do people consider this? Or is it just me?
-Explored far side of city centre first.
-Wondered in Waterstones (the strangeness of how many books we've amassed still perplexes me! So many written words, so many views, and these are just the non-electronic ones. There's too many people - each one a drip of spray struggling to be heard in a stormy sea of voices. Why do we do this?)
-Walked along a path in Princesshay. Dipped into a couple clothes stores. Clothing is too pricey right now.
-Wondered around cathedral area - saw a half-street(?) of Tudor houses - the white and black barred ones...made me think of the Red Weed painting: farm3.static.flickr.com/2818/9…
-Jobs in Pizzeria. Cool to spot - but I'll be damned if I'd wanna work in Exeter.
- caved into buying a KFC. Bad idea - that stuff is starting to lose my interest, now. Even if it is rare that I find a restaurant like that - living as I do in the ass end wilderness of Devonshire nowhere-land.
- Made a bee-line for the bus. I think I was tiring of seeing masses of faces and being unable to sit down still, and comfortable, and get used to my surroundings, and consider anything individually, like I know I needed to.
-On the bus, out the window spotted a woman on the street crying sadly in tears as she talked on the phone. See I just....I don't know. There's too many people here. I find it hard to empathise when I can't possibly know what's going on with any of them - but something's clearly going on.
-Bus to Oke. A Pakistani guy sat next to me jabbering on his phone for the whole journey. Each time he put down, he would scroll his contact list looking for a new friend to phone, and then immediately phone them. He musta got through 4 friends, none of them speaking English. I'm not racist, it's just annoying. If it was and english guy acting like that with his phone, I'd also wish they wouldn't jabber persistently the whole journey, unless their conversation was this beautiful thing that I'd fall in love with and immediately want to eavesdrop on. (rare)
-Girl at front of the bus kept falling asleep and literally 'nodding off' with her head falling forward into sleep and then waking herself up, before nodding back again. It was like an oscillating motion. Was starting to make me laugh (and feel tired too).
- Got off at Oke. Walked the Park. It was incredibly dry, for what, 4th day of Spring?
-Bought a pad in the art store. Not enough pages, but fuckit, my fault for forgetting to visit WHS' when I was in Exe'.
BING. That was: Wandering-plus-thoughts from Today, for you there. Jazzlaciousness.