- Winter has crept in, and I'd say around 12Nov2015 we experienced our first cold air. I'm keeping a close eye on my hands, I think before the month is out they'll definitely change.
- I'm angry tonight because Mum bought Dad alcohol, and it's breaking bridges. He's been sober for almost 3 months since his accident, (and he was drunk when he had his fall, I BLAME the alcohol for it) and now he's drunk again. He asked for it, mum bought it. It pisses me off because we're in the unique position to be able to deprive him of this unhealthy thing for once.
This is the longest time he's been sober, and it's been good, until now. And now it's fucked up. And I'm so, so helpless. I can't go in there and take the alcohol and burn it and chastise him (what I wanna do) because he'd probably rage and act up and have another fall. I can't tell mum she shouldn't have done that and she should never do it again for obvious reasons (she should know better than to buy him alcohol) but she'll rage definitely, and more than Dad.
It's just times like this when once again I hate being around my family. I can't help them if they don't have any desire to help themselves, or if they don't value the help I'm giving. I should be with friends right now, I should be travelling, moving house, trying business plans. I mean fuck them if I try to help them and they ruin it all. I need to be helping myself. I'm being condemned to a life of bullshit here. I would rather be somewhere else. I'd definitely rather be working somewhere else. These people are a 'downer' in a big way, and I haven't yet found a group of people I can be happy around.
I need that instead of this. Also it'd be nice to spend time around people who, when they're in trouble, if you try to help them they're fine with it. And they help themselves to get better & improve theirselves, too.